And I'm only 35. I don't want the pregnancy experience. I just wish they/society in general could be more understanding. I’ve struggled with anxiety for many years and depression for the past year. think of it as a positive feedback - itll just keep getting deeper into darkness UNLESS you put the breaks on it yourself and make a move. I hate people. your brain is deeply affected by bad hormones. I don't even like to hold babies, much less give birth to one. Universities are being controlled by political parties. You need to take that loathing and hate and channel it into something positive. I look at it like being able to wake up from a nightmare that won't stop. Press J to jump to the feed. I have to just find a job and face it. but let me tell you. Cut them out for good. I don't know what it was. I hate existing. "I Don't Want to Live on this Planet Anymore" is an expression and reaction image often used to show disgust or disappointment with others. If you don’t know who you are and what you want, it makes it a lot harder to move forward in your life. Why do they get so fucking mad when they're the ones who told you to just do it already? Not gonna lie, you have to watch out where you walk in San Jose. I can't kill myself because I don't want to burden my family. Before I got pregnant, I would say I was 98 percent sure I didn't want … And the answer is always “I don’t know.” Because I don’t know. I will leave chronic pain, anxiety, panic, and depression forever and it will awesome. and if you hate it still, hit the gym and stick with it. Our only hope for profit is our tourism. Suicide isn't the answer, it never will be. Someone, anyone, will always be there to tell you they love you. The need to stop living is stronger in some. No kids, so I would not orphan anybody. Anyway, I have rambled on enough I think. *edit: guess I was wrong they are on reddit... EVERYONES ON REDDIT! Why shouldn't it be okay for me to kill myself when everyone has already told me to do it? Does it suck to live in Greece these days? Watch: How to Set a Goal When You Don’t Know What You Want. “No, I don’t want to go there.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had this conversation with my husband. I don't think nursing will be a good fit for me. Devotion, responsibility, and thought. I have been counting the days until I go away to college. Don't worry so much about the end result of satisfaction or happiness, that all comes with time, for now, it important that you give your anxiety and depression the acknowledgement it deserves, and then, you do something positive. I’m 72 (but 30 on the inside). Or if not, know that another stranger on the internet has felt your pain and cares about you. You matter. Lots of Riots, every second month there are riots in Athens and Salonica. Man it feels like I'm on The Truman Show where people talk about NZ like it's the best place on Earth whenever we're mentioned on reddit. like and subscribe for nothing in returnEnjoy some skittles! I had a suicide attempt this past May followed by months of therapy. I don’t know if you drink or not but I had the first hand experience of stopping drinking and my self harm thoughts got much more manageable. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the TrueOffMyChest community, Press J to jump to the feed. I'm hugging you so hard in my mind right now <3. Example: Zagorakis (Greek Soccer Player that was the MVP of Euro 2004 final) was elected on European Elections recently because he was famous. If you go to Syntagma square it smells like tear gasses. I still feel the same way and I think I’ll always feel like this. But if you give up, you forfeit any possibility of things changing or improving. Wanna draw? You have better chances finding a job as an immigrant rather than Greek, because bosses take advantage of the system and hire people for ridiculously low wages and without insurance. They want to get, get, get with the most minimal amount of giving. Insane gas prices which is mostly tax from our goverment. With change comes reinvention. Wanna learn a new craft? The things you do matter. I don't know what it is. i used to be like that. It can be found in life. The meds my doc put me on aren’t doing a thing. I just don’t know where to go and am afraid to make a … Because most people don’t care about a long-term vision and they only care about their own short-term vision. YOU are worth more than depression can have a hold of you. It’s Saturday and I’ve been wandering around filling in time. He asks me where I want to eat, what movie I want to see, what I want for Christmas. I'm hugging you so hard in my mind right now <3. That's why we have 700,000 civil servants in a 10,000,000 population country. Thank you for that. Do it. They don't know what it's like to no longer see life in color....to no longer taste anything. I didn’t have a choice about moving to my current home after my husband died 4 years ago. I tried to commit suicide several years ago and don't know how I didn't succeed. imagine all the hatred and hurt and pain youve felt attacked you at once. He can't even speak proper English, hell he can't even speak Greek. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. you want to love yourself? (Lookin at you Australia). I'm very shy with no people skills. There are either lower middle class, poor or very rich. There are a lot of people who abuse public transport services and use them without a ticket. Draw. and i mean REALLY, then you can escape it. People cannot comprehend a life where the only emotion that you are able to experience is pain. But one of these days, my parents will die and my wife will leave....and I will be free to do what I think is right. We get a lot of tourists especially in summer and the people try to rip them off as much as they can asking for insane prices for something that is relatively cheap. I just can’t stand the guilt of what it would do to my friends and family if I killed myself. if youre willing to throw away your life because of how bad it is. Sometimes, the heaviness of this feeling simply comes down to this. I haven’t been taking good care of myself this week. I’m just so tired and fed up with dealing with the stress everyday. I told myself it was okay to be depressed. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. A man of principle, work, and character. I know. We want to be a certain type of person. Wanna go on a walk in the rain? We are working on fixing some of these problems, so check back in ten years. happiness doesnt appear on your lap, happiness takes effort. I have recently been dealing with anxiety and depression due to medical reasons. I can’t believe this post was almost 6 months ago. Some days are still very hard and the anxiety & pain are always there. I've also in the past said exactly the same thing. I have never experienced it before and do not wish it on my worst enemy. I’m slowly going where you are and hope you can bounce out of it. Waking up every morning and the first thought on your mind is ending it all. I know I’m depressed due to a lot of things. Do it. Depression and anxiety are so damn common these days. If it were my grand son, I’d probably have that conversation with the parents and see if they want me to talk to their kid or not. Based on a character stillshot of Professor Farnsworth from the animated television show Futurama , the reaction image is frequently used on image boards and forums when replying to someone else's post that is deemed irritable or disagreeable (See also Are You Serious Face). On a Greek Island overlooking the blue blue Mediterranean. get up and fight. 2. I don't have the motivation to do anything with my life. I have hopes and dreams but I'm starting to think that they won't work out, I don't have a lot of friends I have trouble making friends and I feel like nobody likes me. I’m 18 years old … I don’t know what exactly but I know I have the biggest desire to believe in something. I love you, OP. I really just don’t want to be alive anymore. Unless you have some terrible illness possible bro . But I have found some relief in life. Whoever or whatever is making you like this. Aucklander here so I'll be focusing a bit on Auckland: everything is expensive, compared to the U.S, except health care and education; house prices are crazy in Auckland and Christchurch, our largest and third largest cities respectively; we lack the scale for some cool things that larger places have, eg. this is universal advice. I’m trying really hard to dig myself out of it through therapy it’s just really really hard to climb out when you’re in this deep. I have social anxiety. im telling you its possible. Depression makes my brain go into hyper "fix it" mode (before it crashes). Are we really that high up on people's list of countries to visit/live? No matter how misguided in my opinion they are. I don’t know if I want to live anymore Tw: suicidal thoughts I’ve felt suicidal in my past but always denied it, this is the first time I’ve ever contemplated it. I'm not afraid to die. “I don’t deserve to live” sometimes means I don’t want to face that I have needs. Like mentioned below, it is dangerous. You can go hunting/fishing everywhere and not see another person for days. But nothing out of this world, there are secure zones and there are no curfews, like other countries in Central America. There are also many reasons people don’t have sex, even it’s something they desperately want. And thanks for the gold kind stranger, I have no idea what it does but I'll definitely make sure to find out. It’s harder, still, to identify new goals and passions when you find yourself living a life you hadn’t quite planned on. Celebrities get elected in European Elections, National Elections and Local Elections just because they are famous. The media are being controlled by political parties and try to spread propaganda about how we are recovering from our crysis. It's an injustice to think that you will. The minimum wage keeps getting lower and lower, it used to be 800€/mo and soon will be 550€/mo. Cyrus Ausar shares his perspective on the thoughts of not wanting to live anymore and not wanting to commit suicide. It's okay to be unhappy, it's okay to be miserable and hate your current situation/life. I don’t think there is any solution to my problems, except to just get out there and do it. I've been through this full forced. If you have any questions, happy to help. Hi. Thank you. I hope that you find relief. I hate the humanness of burnout, of being tired. I know some people can relate to this. And it was hard. Like nothing about me or anything I did was ever even CLOSE to good enough. Almost no part of me wants to live anymore. Using your knowledge of what you don’t want. You know its the right place to move to when literally no one from that country shows up and comments here because instead of wasting time on reddit they are actually out enjoying their lives. I don’t know how old you all are. good theme parks; country is young so we don't have much in the way of nice (read: old) architecture, we've got natural scenery up the wazoo but not so much of the man-made kind; Auckland and Wellington are our two largest cities and both are hilly as fuck, so good luck if you want to ride a bike; limited public transport (again, lack of scale hurts us here, but also bad planning in the past), especially Auckland, not sure about Wellington; no direct route to Auckland International Airport, so you'll end up driving through suburbs to get to/from the airport; thin ozone layer, so you'll sunburn easily unless you're diligent about wearing sunscreen or don't go outside for long periods, and of course more chance of skin cancer; earthquakes, except for the upper half of the north island. This is such a big one. when youre that indeep you see no hope and you cant fathom hope, you feel entirely stuck and trapped that you believe it and dont see any exits. It is more expensive than other countries in Latin America, but it's definitely cheaper than Europe/North America. While life can throw us curveballs, the truth is most people are not willing to do the work it takes to achieve what they want. WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE than TRY. When you feel like you add nothing of value to anyone else's life, including your own, the option is pondered. No animals can kill you. I have worked so hard to drag myself out of that dark, dark place I hope to never go back to. you just gotta make the effort. The truth is, most people don’t work hard. But eventually I had a break through. Despite what everyone here is saying: “life is worth living” etc, I want to let you know what I feel. Why? Other than them and a few friends, no one would notice or care about my being. I agree with you. I don't want to live near people at all. If you were dead, you can't console those mourning your death, particularly by suicide. 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